Finding Contentment and Joy in Singleness

Introduction: A Personal Reflection

Hello, it's been a while since I last wrote to you. I didn’t reach out last week because I wasn’t in the space to pour out; I needed to be poured into. I felt bad because I promised consistency—not to miss a week. But I also committed to writing as the Holy Spirit leads, and last week, I needed His help. I thank God for restoration, and this experience reminded me why we need God’s continuous help.

Finding Contentment in Singleness

This week, we’ll focus on finding contentment and joy in singleness.

Over the past week, we’ve talked about our identity as children of God. By now, if you've been following along, your confidence should be boosted by knowing who you are and who your Father is. From understanding your identity in God, I believe you've experienced a joy from this knowledge—a joy that’s hard to define. The Bible says, “Those who know their God shall do great exploits.”

Many people rush out of the singlehood phase, forgetting that each season has a purpose. Instead of asking, “God, when?” we should be asking, “God, what?” What does He want us to learn in this phase? What steps can we take to make our lives meaningful for Him during this time?

Avoiding the Idol of Companionship

The Lord brought 1 Timothy 6:6 to my heart, and as I read further to verse 10, which discusses how the love of money is the root of all evil, the Holy Spirit prompted me to replace the word "money" with "companionship." It made so much sense. It’s not just money that can lead us away from God; anything we place above Him can become an idol. Some people are so eager for companionship that they’ve wandered from the faith, only to have their hearts broken by the very thing they sought.

The desire for companionship can stem from the belief that one is incomplete, even when God says we are “fearfully and wonderfully made.” Seeking a companion to fill that perceived void can lead to heartbreak, as the very thing meant to heal us becomes the source of more pain. I’ve learned this the hard way—nothing can be placed above God and expected to bring us joy or fulfillment.

The Importance of Trusting God’s Timing

The companion you may desire isn’t what you need right now. I know that’s hard to hear, especially when scripture supports the institution of marriage. But what if what you need most is God? If you haven’t trusted Him to bring about what’s best for you, there’s still work to be done. If you can’t find contentment in this phase while trusting God’s plan, then there’s still work to be done.

Don’t get me wrong—desiring companionship isn’t bad. But your intentions and motives matter. When we try to fill the spaces in our hearts that only God can fill, we need to take a step back and examine ourselves.

We must learn to be content and joyful in our current season, trusting that God is working out His best for us. Think about it: If you had a child who never said thank you for all you’ve done, but only complained about what they haven’t received, how would that make you feel? That’s how God feels when we aren’t grateful for where we are but instead complain about what we lack.

Retracing Your Steps Back to God

Have you acted out of desperation in seeking companionship, distancing yourself from God in the process? Can you retrace your steps and return to the Father, knowing He has your best interest at heart and will not mismanage your life?

The Bible says, “Whoever loses their life for My sake will find it.” (Matthew 10:39) Can you let go of those desperate desires and idols? Can you release them to God so that beautiful things can come to you in fullness?

Rejoicing in God’s Promises

Rejoice in God’s promise in Jeremiah 29:11: “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Can you be content and joyful in the provision of these promises, even when you desire more? Can you thank God for this phase and trust that He has the best companion in store for you?

Do you believe it? Are you confident that even when the strong lions grow weak and hungry, you will lack nothing because the Lord is your portion (Psalm 34:10)? Can you trust in Lamentations 3:24, “The Lord is my portion, therefore I will wait for Him,” and make this your boast? Will you wait for His will?

The Bible assures us that God gives the best gifts to His children. My question to you is: Will you wait for His perfect timing, or will you be desperate, risking heartbreak and sorrow?

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Conclusion

In our pursuit of companionship, it is essential to remember that true fulfillment comes from God alone. While the desire for partnership is natural and God-given, our contentment and joy should never depend on anything outside of Him. When we place God at the center of our lives, trusting in His timing and plan, we can find peace in every season—even in singleness. Let us release our desperation, embrace God’s promises, and trust that He is preparing the best for us, in His perfect time.